Philadelphia

SEIDMAN: Do you really think so, Andy?

ANDREW: Yes, Bob, I do. Excuse me? Am I being fired?

SEIDMAN: What was the file name?

ANDREW: K-R-O-one.

SEIDMAN: Maybe you mistyped the name when you were saving it. We'll try combinations of those letters...

SEIDMAN: What in God's name... ?

ANDREW: Bob...

SEIDMAN: What's wrong with your face?

ANDREW: What's wrong with my face? You want to know what's wrong with my face? I've got a skin condition. Next question, Bob? No more questions? Fine. Now can you help me find the complaint?

SEIDMAN: Allright. Calm down.

ANDREW: Sorry...

SEIDMAN: Jesus.

ANDREW: I don't know what to do, Bob.

SEIDMAN: You'll never find it in the dark.

ANDREW: Yes!

SEIDMAN: You'll have to get right on it, Andy, we're up against the statute of limitations.

ANDREW: If MacroSystems wins, an energetic, young company will be destroyed, five thousand Americans will be out of work. Moreover, the laws of copyright and anti-trust were enacted to prevent exactly the kind of bullshit Macrosystems is trying to pull.

SEIDMAN: Andy, do you know who reps Kronos Inc.?

ANDREW: Bailey, Brackman.

SEIDMAN: Are we interrupting, Andy?

ANDREW: In a word, Bob...

SEIDMAN: Charles is right behind me.

ANDREW: Excuse me, Charles. With all due respect... this is... preposterous! It doesn't make any sense, it sounds as if we're talking about someone else. Pardon the lack of humility, but I've had the distinct impression I was kind of... one of the rising stars around here. And I feel that wasn't just my imagination. And I also think I deserve to know what's really going on here, Charles.

KENTON: Oh, you're right, Beckett, you don't have an attitude problem.

ANDREW: Perhaps... you're right. I've certainly been busy. With the Kronos complaint, a preliminary injunction hearing and the Saunders trial all falling at the same time...

KENTON: Some people think you have an attitude problem, Beckett.

ANDREW: Really? Who thinks that, sir?

KENTON: This time. What about next time?

ANDREW: There won't be a next time, I guarantee it.

ANDREW: You're right, I probably just misfiled...

KENTON: Andy?

ANDREW: Thanks, Walter.

KENTON: What's that on your forehead, pal?

ANDREW: Whacked with a racquetball. I appreciate your faith in my abilities.

KENTON: Why, Beckett?

ANDREW: Because they deserve to, Walter.

ANDREW: I'm ready...

MIGUEL: Ready for what, baby?

ANDREW: Whatever.

MIGUEL: I hope you're ready for "Studs," because that's what's on.

ANDREW: ALLRIGHT IT'S CLOSED! Jesus!

MIGUEL: The least you can do is look at me, while I'm sticking this shit into your arm. Forget the fucking case, one hour a day, and give me a little of your time.

ANDREW: You don't think there's much time left, do you?

MIGUEL: That's not what I said.

ANDREW: You're scared. You think we're near the end.

MIGUEL: No.

ANDREW: Maybe I should start making plans, is that what you think? Start planning my memorial service? "Begin to prepare for the inevitable."

MIGUEL: Maybe you should think about it.

ANDREW: What's that mean?!

MIGUEL: Maybe you should think about it.

ANDREW: I'm not going to die.

MIGUEL: That's right. We're on the Positive Plan. You don't have a Fatal Disease, you have Manageable Illness.

ANDREW: You want me to give up? Let this thing turn us into victims?

MIGUEL: Then, what are we, Drew?! The winners? "Ladies and gentlemen, the first prize of AIDS goes to Andrew Beckett and his lover Miguel..." Excuse me, I'm not your lover. I'm your Care Partner. FUCK!

ANDREW: I'm not ready to die.

MIGUEL: Do you think I'm ready for it?! I hate this shit. I'm not a fucking martyr! I hate every goddamn part of it!

ANDREW: What's wrong with you?

MIGUEL: Close the law book.

ANDREW: I'm not going to close the--

MIGUEL: CLOSE THE FUCKING LAW BOOK!

MIGUEL: Hold still. Shit. The goddamn vein's clotted. We have to go the goddamn hospital, so they can change the goddamn catheter.

ANDREW: I have too much work to do. Skip the treatment.

MIGUEL: We're not skipping this treatment.

ANDREW: I said, skip it, Michael. It's my treatment.

MIGUEL: Fuck you.

ANDREW: Fuck you. This shit's probably not doing me any good anyway.

MIGUEL: That shit's saving your life, you asshole!

ANDREW: You got that right, Mikey... You still believe that, don't you?

MIGUEL: Yes. I think it will be a simple solution. They'll put it in a syringe, inject it into your bloodstream. It'll neutralize the virus. It'll revitalize the immune system, and people with AIDS will become healthy again.

ANDREW: Jerk... What did you say?

MIGUEL: I said, "Everyone's going to die, Jimmy. But Drew's not going to die of AIDS. There's a cure around the corner, and he plans to be around to take advantage of it."

MIGUEL: You're leaving the hospital? You're going into the office looking like that? Are you insane?

ANDREW: One hour!

MIGUEL: Drew!

ANDREW: I promise!

ANDREW: Thanks for leaving school, and coming here, and... I will be back. An hour, tops.

MIGUEL: You're going to the office?!

ANDREW: You're not smiling.

MIGUEL: Why are you getting dressed?

ANDREW: You're not going to like this. Please try to smile...

ANDREW: That's the third time. I better call the office. Would you relax, please?

MIGUEL: I am relaxed.

MIGUEL: Don't apologize for me.

ANDREW: He's not sorry, okay, fine. Why don't we see what we find out from the blood work? I'll work on getting a specimen, I'm sure hospital food could help in that direction. Maybe, by then, we'll hear from my doctor, and we'll go from there. Okay? Everybody happy?

MIGUEL: It could be parasites, an infection...

ANDREW: A reaction to AZT...

ANDREW: I almost didn't make it to the bathroom, Miguel. I almost lost control right in front of everybody.

MIGUEL: So what? It's nothing to be ashamed of. You have nothing to be ashamed of, okay?

ANDREW: Aren't you giving an exam?

MIGUEL: I said, don't worry about it.

ANDREW: Thanks, you guys.

MIGUEL: Yeah. Thanks, guys.

WHEELER: Longstreet's interested in the Harrisburg deal.

ANDREW: I'm seeing him this afternoon.

ANDREW: You can save it for the jury, Charles. I want to hear you say, under oath, in front of a judge and a jury, I'm a bad lawyer. Gentlemen. Counselor.

WHEELER: Don't do this, Andy.

WHEELER: Take it easy, Walter.

ANDREW: If you'd lost confidence in me, why did you give me the Kronos suit?

WHEELER: I hoped the challenge would improve your performance. You could say it was a carrot.

ANDREW: A carrot?!

WHEELER: We've been talking it over, Andy. Your future that is... We feel that, because we respect you so much, we have to be honest with you.

ANDREW: Honesty is always best.

ANDREW: I know that, Charles.

WHEELER: More than your friend. Family.

WHEELER: Thanks for coming in.

ANDREW: Of course.

ANDREW: Thanks, Charles.

WHEELER: No sweat, buddy.

ANDREW: It is, and it isn't, Charles. Macrosystem's new software copies all the best-known elements of Kronos' spreadsheet program. If they're allowed to sell it, Kronos will get undersold right out of business. For me, the legal principle, involved is copyright infringement.

WHEELER: Bearing in mind that Bill Wright, the chairman of MacroSystems, is a close, personal friend of mine... which side of this mess would you desire to be on, Andy? And don't allow my very tight, personal relationship with Bill to influence your answer in any way.

INTERN: I'm trying to help your "partner." You're not a member of his immediate family, I could have you removed from the ER.

ANDREW: He's upset, he's sorry.

ANDREW: This is my partner. We keep records of hospital visits. Nothing personal.

INTERN: Dr. Klenstein. It's not a pleasant procedure, but if the KS is causing the diarrhea, we ought to know right away.

INTERN: ... meanwhile, I'd like to prepare you for a colonoscopy, so we can take a look inside.

ANDREW: Sounds delightful.

INTERN: Mr. Beckett, I'm sorry...

ANDREW: About my blood work?

INTERN: We're waiting...

ANDREW: Thanks for coming by.

JOE: You bet. We'll see you later.

JOE: I better get home. Lisa and I are having some friends over.

ANDREW: Sure thing.

ANDREW: Excellent work, Joe. I thank you.

JOE: It was good working with you, Andrew. You're welcome. Hey. Shouldn't you put that thing back on?

ANDREW: What do you call a thousand lawyers chained together at the bottom of the ocean?

JOE: What?

ANDREW: A good start.

JOE: Can you see the lesions on your chest in this mirror?

ANDREW: Yes.

JOE: Thank you.

JOE: Do you have any lesions on any part of your body, at this time, that resemble the lesions that were on your face at the time you were fired?

ANDREW: Yes. On my torso.

JOE: If it please the court, I'd like to ask Mr. Beckett to remove his shirt, so that the jury can have an accurate idea of what we're talking about.

JOE: Are you a good lawyer?

ANDREW: I'm an excellent lawyer.

JOE: What makes you an excellent lawyer?

ANDREW: I love the law. I know the law. I excel at practicing it. It's the only thing I've ever wanted to do.

JOE: What do you love about it?

ANDREW: Well... many things. But I think the thing I love the most, is that every once in a while, not that often, but occasionally... you get to be part of justice being done. It's really quite a thrill when that happens.

JOE: A regular all-American guy?

ANDREW: I suppose you could say that.

JOE: Except... you were gay?

ANDREW: I still am.

JOE: In the years you worked at Wyant Wheeler, did you ever tell Charles Wheeler you were gay?

ANDREW: No. I didn't.

JOE: Can you explain why you didn't?

ANDREW: You don't bring your personal life into a law firm. You're not supposed to have a personal life, really. Anyway, I did plan to tell Charles, eventually. But then, this thing happened at the tennis club...

JOE: Obviously, at this time, you weren't sick.

ANDREW: It's possible I was infected with the HIV virus at that time, but I wasn't diagnosed until several years later.

JOE: You didn't look then, the way you look now?

ANDREW: Particularly, Charles.

JOE: What impressed you about him?

ANDREW: He was... the kind of person I thought I wanted to be.

JOE: What kind of person is that?

ANDREW: Possessed of an encyclopedic knowledge of the law. A razor sharp litigator, a genuine leader, gifted at bringing out the very best in others. An awesome ability to illuminate the most complex of legal concepts to colleagues, courtrooms, the person on the street. The kind of person who plays three sets of tennis but doesn't sweat. But underneath the elegant surface, was an adventurous spirit.

ANDREW: I'll look over the Q and A.

JOE: You're ready, don't worry.

JOE: Opera?

ANDREW: Want to hear my favorite aria?

JOE: Opera?

JOE: Then we establish how Wheeler's boys recruited you after law school...

ANDREW: What have you prayed for?

JOE: For a healthy baby. For Lisa to make it through the delivery. For the Phillies to get into the playoffs.

ANDREW: There's a possibility I won't be around for the end of this trial.

JOE: I've considered that.

ANDREW: What happens?

JOE: We proceed, representing your estate.

ANDREW: I've made provisions in my will for some charities. Miguel will need a lawyer. I know it's not your area...

JOE: I know a good probate lawyer.

ANDREW: Thanks. Do you like opera?

JOE: When you refer to Wheeler, call him Charles, to show how you'd been admitted to the inner circle, you were considered one of them.

ANDREW: Uh huh...

JOE: Beckett?

ANDREW: Charles. Okay. Miller?

JOE: What?

ANDREW: Do you... pray?

ANDREW: You survived your first gay party intact.

JOE: Let me tell you something, okay? When you're brought up, like the rest of us, in a place like where I was brought up, there's not a whole lot of discussion about... homosexuals. As a kid, you're taught right away that queers are weird, queers are funny, they're a danger to kids, they're afraid to fight, and they all want to cop your joint. And that pretty much sums up the general thinking out there, if you want to know the truth.

ANDREW: Thank you for sharing that with me, Joe.

JOE: Let's review these notes for your testimony. We have a big day on Monday.

JOE: You think I'm uncomfortable...

ANDREW: Correct.

JOE: You're right.

ANDREW: What do you want?

JOE: Beer. We need to go over your Q and A.

ANDREW: Excuse me, I'm having a goddamn party, is that allright with you?

JOE: Sure. It's fine.

ANDREW: No, we have to do it. But later, allright?

JOE: Thank you.

JOE: I'm a law suit.

ANDREW: Not bad.

JOE: Get it?

ANDREW: Let's find you a drink.

JOE: Beckett. You seem... better. Energized, more alive...

ANDREW: I had a blood transfusion today. I feel great.

ANDREW: PARRTYY!

JOE: We're friends of Beckett's.

ANDREW: It's me, you dork.

JOE: One more thing, Your Honor...

ANDREW: Any settlement agreement must include, and this is critical, a letter of exoneration, making clear my termination had nothing to do with the quality of my work.

JOE: There is no relevant precedent.

ANDREW: Arline decision. Supreme Court.

JOE: Arline?

JOE: So Kenton connected the... lesion, and whatever suspicions he had about your personal life... to this woman, Maria... and blew the whistle on you. Suddenly you're losing files, and it's time to let you go. But, up to this point, you've been their Golden Boy, their rising star... Their behavior is... inconsistent.

ANDREW: Thank you.

ANDREW: The partner who spotted the lesion, Walter Kenton, used to work for Benton, Myers, in D.C. There's a paralegal there, Maria Torres. She's had lesions on and off for three years. She says it was common knowledge around the office that her lesions were caused by AIDS.

JOE: They didn't fire her?

ANDREW: No. They didn't fire her.

JOE: How did they find out?

ANDREW: One of the partners spotted a lesion on my forehead.

JOE: Who'd you get?

ANDREW: What?

JOE: Find a lawyer?

ANDREW: I'm a lawyer. How's your baby?

JOE: Huh? Oh. Great. She's great.

ANDREW: What's her name?

JOE: Rayisha.

ANDREW: Rayisha. Very nice.

JOE: Oh, Beckett. How's it goin'?

ANDREW: Fine.

ANDREW: Thanks for your time.

JOE: Beckett? I'm sorry about... what's happened to you. It's a fucking kick in the head.

ANDREW: Don't send flowers, Joe. I'm not dead yet.

JOE: Okay... They want you out. It's against the law to fire you for having AIDS, so they make you look like a fuck up. Which leads us to the mysterious, lost file.

ANDREW: They sabotaged me.

JOE: I knew you were going to say that. I don't buy it, and I don't see a case.

ANDREW: Look. I know I have a case. If you don't want to take it for personal reasons...

JOE: Correct. I don't.

ANDREW: The law says people with disabilities cannot be terminated, so long as they can perform the duties required by their position...

JOE: Okay, okay... They discover you have this horrible, disgusting, terminal illness, and they panic, for any number of perfectly valid reasons. They're frightened for themselves, their families... Maybe it's the homo angle. Maybe they don't want to rub elbows with someone who's just popped out of the closet with a terminal case of acne. And how do they explain your status to the client for Chrissake?

ANDREW: Joe, from the day I arrived to the day they fired me, I performed consistently, thoroughly and with absolute excellence. And if they hadn't fired me, that's what I'd be doing today.

JOE: I buy that.

ANDREW: As in, the vegetable?

JOE: Big trouble.

ANDREW: Charles, I must apologize again, for the Kronos mishap. It was a scary few minutes around here. Wow. But thank God, the complaint was found. And no damage was done.

JOE: Hell, they are staring. What's that shit on your face?

ANDREW: Makeup.

ANDREW: New baby?

JOE: One week old.

ANDREW: Congratulations.

JOE: Little baby girl.

ANDREW: Kids are great.

JOE: Thanks, Beckett. I'm real excited about it. What can I do for you?

ANDREW: I was fired by Wyant Wheeler. I plan to bring a wrongful termination suit against Charles Wheeler and his partners.

JOE: You want to sue Wyant Wheeler Hellerman Tetlow and Brown?

ANDREW: Correct. I'm seeking representation.

JOE: Continue.

ANDREW: I misplaced an important complaint. That's their story. Want to hear mine?

JOE: How many lawyers did you go to, before you called me?

ANDREW: Nine.

JOE: Continue.

ANDREW: I was diagnosed with AIDS eight months ago. During a bout of pneumonia. I recovered quickly and was back at work in ten days. Since I was doing so well on the AZT, we decided against telling anyone about it.

JOE: We?

ANDREW: My lover and I.

JOE: Your... lover?

ANDREW: Miguel Alvarez. We've lived together for nine years.

JOE: Continue.

ANDREW: I dove back into work, everything was fine. Until the lesions started...

JOE: Whoa-oh! Sorry, I...

ANDREW: It's okay. Can I sit down?

JOE: Uh, yeah.

JOE: Jesus Christ, what happened to you?

ANDREW: I have AIDS.

ANDREW: Client of yours?

JOE: Funny.

JOE: Innocuous?

ANDREW: Defined by Webster's as harmless.

JOE: I know what it means. Your Honor, imagine how the children in this neighborhood have been made to feel. The pounding of construction ringing in their ears as this skyscraper, a tribute to mankind's greed, grows daily, casting an ominous shadow over their lives, filling them with dread even as they are surrounded in a black, toxic fog, blocking out the sun while poisoning their lungs! And Counselor calls it harmless?!

JOE: Your Honor, since Rockwell Corp. began construction, the surrounding residential neighborhood has been enshrouded in a cloud of foul-smelling, germ-carrying, pestilent dust. My client is being forced to breathe known carcinogens daily! Other residents are coming forth on a daily basis to add their voices of outrage!

ANDREW: Your Honor, I submit there were no complaints until Counselor began knocking on doors, drumming up business. And the dust, which Counselor refers to, has appeared on only three occasions. Each time it has been examined and the results...

RACHEL: I thought I was supposed to be covering for you. God, Andy, you look awful.

ANDREW: Fucking Word Processing lost my Kronos complaint. Which must be filed by fucking five o'clock! If it's late, there's no case... Every problem has a solution.

RACHEL: What can I do?

ANDREW: Get down to Word Processing. Help Jamey look.

ANDREW: Rach.

RACHEL: I'm late, I have to pick up Amy from her afterschool but I want to talk to you about that Hansen thing.

ANDREW: Catch me later, I'll be here. And tell Amy, I love her painting, it's on my wall.

ANDREW: By the time I was fired, there were four lesions on my face, much bigger...

BELINDA: Answer the question, please.

ANDREW: No. I can't really see it.

BELINDA: Thank you.

BELINDA: You've testified the lesions on your face were visible to the people you worked with, correct?

ANDREW: That's right.

BELINDA: And it's your contention, that when the partners were made aware of the lesions, they jumped to the conclusion you had AIDS and fired you.

ANDREW: Absolutely.

BELINDA: Do you have any lesions on your face at this time?

ANDREW: One. Here, in front of my ear.

ANDREW: Yes.

BELINDA: You could have infected him, isn't that right?

ANDREW: Miguel has not been infected. As I said, we weren't aware of AIDS, then, or how it is spread.

BELINDA: Really?

ANDREW: Yes.

ANDREW: Some do. I didn't.

BELINDA: As a homosexual, one is often forced to conceal one's sexuality, is that right?

ANDREW: In some situations.

BELINDA: Isn't it true you have spent your life pretending to be something you're not, so much so that the art of concealment and dishonesty has become second nature to you?!

BELINDA: Do you need a break?

ANDREW: No.

BELINDA: While you were employed at Wyant Wheeler, you did everything you could to make sure no one knew you were an active homosexual, correct?

ANDREW: That is not correct. I never lied about it.

BELINDA: Did you keep a picture of your lover on your desk?

ANDREW: No.

BELINDA: Do other lawyers at the firm keep pictures of their spouses or fiances on their desks?

BELINDA: When? Approximately what year did this event take place?

ANDREW: I guess it was 1984, 85.

BELINDA: Were you aware in 1984 or 1985 that there was a fatal disease out there, called AIDS, and that you could contract it through sexual activity?

ANDREW: It's impossible to know exactly when or how I was infected with HIV.

BELINDA: But you were having anonymous sex in porno theaters in 1984 and 1985?

ANDREW: That happened once. People weren't talking about AIDS then, the way we are now. Or safe sex.

BELINDA: You'd heard of AIDS in 1984, 85?

ANDREW: I'd heard of something. The gay plague, gay cancer, but... we didn't know how you could get it, or that it could kill you.

BELINDA: What kind of movies do they show there?

ANDREW: Gay movies.

BELINDA: Gay pornographic movies?

ANDREW: Yes.

BELINDA: Do men have sex with each other in that theater?

ANDREW: Yes.

BELINDA: You said earlier you aspired to be the kind of person who had "an adventurous spirit." Is that correct?

ANDREW: Something like that.

BELINDA: Do you take risks?

ANDREW: In my work? Yes. Calculated risks. You have to.

BELINDA: In general. Do you take risks in other areas of your life?

ANDREW: Not unnecessary ones.

BELINDA: Have you ever been to the Apollo Cinema on Sansom Street?

ANDREW: Mom?

SARAH: All I know is, you got through your diagnosis fine, like a trooper. But when they fired you... you were so devastated, Andy... I don't expect any of my kids to sit in the back of the bus. Fight for your rights.

ANDREW: Thanks, Mom... Dad?

ANDREW: Hi, Mom. How do you feel on your fortieth anniversary?

SARAH: Ancient. How do you think I feel? Put that thing down and give me a hug. Andrew, stop! ... He still doesn't listen.

ANDREW: Where's Dad?

SARAH: He's out in his shed showing your uncle his new riding mower.

ANDREW: Gillman says I'm fine. My blood work is excellent. T-cells are up. Just a sec ... Yes, I think that would alleviate most of our concerns. My platelets look good too.

SARAH: Are you on one of those conference calls? I hate when you put me on hold.

SARAH: Andy! This is a nice surprise. How are you, hon?

ANDREW: I'm fine.

SARAH: What's Dr. Gillman say?

ANDREW: Hold on, Mom. There's no way my client will go along with that.

SARAH: Hello?

ANDREW: Hi, Mom. It's me.

BELINDA: Miss Burton? Do you still work at Wyant Wheeler?

ANTHEA: Yes.

BELINDA: Were you recently promoted?

ANTHEA: Yes. I'm now in charge of the paralegal department.

BELINDA: Thank you.

ANTHEA: He was losing weight. He looked kind of tired sometimes. But he was working so hard... Still, I felt something was wrong. And I can't believe they're saying they didn't notice anything.

BELINDA: Objection.

ANTHEA: Apparently, Mr. Wheeler felt they were too... "ethnic" is the word she used. She said he would like it if I wore something smaller, less garish, and... more "American."

JOE: What did you say?

ANTHEA: I said my earrings are American. They're African-American.

JOE: Thank you. No more questions.

JOE: In what way?

ANTHEA: Well... One time, Mr. Wheeler's secretary, Lydia, told me Mr. Wheeler had a problem with my earrings.

JOE: Your earrings?

JOE: Ms. Burton. You're black.

ANTHEA: Is that a question?

JOE: No. Have you ever felt discriminated against, at Wyant Wheeler?

ANTHEA: Yes.

BELINDA: We object, Your Honor. It would unfairly influence the jury.

JOE: Your Honor, if Mr. Beckett was forced by his illness to use a wheelchair, would the defense ask him to park it outside? We're talking about AIDS, we're talking about lesions. Let's see what we're talking about.

JOE: Objection!

BELINDA: I'll withdraw it. Mr. Beckett? Were you living with Miguel Alvarez in 1984 or 1985 when you had your anonymous sexual encounter in the porn theater?

BELINDA: Objection!

JOE: I'll withdraw. You were aware, when you worked with Maria Torres, that she had AIDS, correct?

BELINDA: Objection!

JOE: I'll rephrase. Did you have anything to do with this file being... misplaced?

JOE: And, when lawyers break the law, when this society loses respect for the law, when that day comes, our cherished institutions will be burned to the ground, and our children and grandchildren will live like savages.

BELINDA: Fact. Andrew Beckett performed at a consistently mediocre level. Fact. He made a grievous error on a multi-million dollar lawsuit... Fact. He claims he is the victim of lies and deceit. Fact. Andrew Beckett lied to his employers, going to great efforts to conceal his disease from them. Fact. He was successful in his duplicity. The partners at Wyant Wheeler did not know Andrew Beckett had AIDS when they fired him...

DR. ARMBRUSTER: A homosexual encounter.

JOE: Get real.

DR. ARMBRUSTER: Unprotected sex with a prostitute.

JOE: Uh.... No. Not really.

DR. ARMBRUSTER: Or unprotected sex with someone you didn't know very well, any time during the last twelve years.

JOE: The guy sat in my office! You can't get AIDS that way, right?

DR. ARMBRUSTER: Right.

JOE: It doesn't travel through the air, by breathing, or touching, right?

DR. ARMBRUSTER: Not by touching, or shaking hands, or hugging, using the same toilet... Even kissing someone with AIDS is safe. But it there's something in your past you're worried about...

JOE: Thanks, Doc, but I don't need an AIDS test. Are you crazy? But thanks for the information. Really.

DR. ARMBRUSTER: We're going to draw blood.

JOE: Why are we going to do that?

DR. ARMBRUSTER: Joe. I don't care a whit about your private life.

JOE: You want to give me an AIDS test?!

DR. ARMBRUSTER: Leave that.

JOE: Yeah, but Doc, isn't it true they keep finding out new things about this disease? So you tell me, today, there's no danger, and I go home, and I hold my baby, and six months from now I hear on the news: "whoops! We were wrong.' You can carry it on your clothes, your skin, and now I've got to worry about my kid. What are you doing?

DR. ARMBRUSTER: The HIV virus can only be transmitted through the exchange of bodily fluids, namely blood and semen.

JOE: Right.

DR. ARMBRUSTER: You had contact with someone who has AIDS, and you're worried.

JOE: I'm not worried. What are you doing?

JOE: It's a long way between being overwhelmed and being satisfied. A cheeseburger may be satisfying whereas caviar and champagne and roast duck and baked Alaska for dessert might be considered overwhelming. Do you agree?

LAIRD: I might.

JOE: Five months ago you characterized Andrew Beckett as caviar and now you're calling him a cheeseburger. Your standards have shifted a great deal, and I'd like to know why you've changed your mind.

LAIRD: Since that time I've devoted more thought to the subject, and that's how I feel now.

JOE: Okay, Mr. Laird. Explain this to me like I'm a four year old: Did Andrew Beckett win your lawsuit for you or not?

LAIRD: We won.

JOE: Did that thrill, impress and overwhelm you?

LAIRD: It satisfied me.

JOE: Mr. Laird, when I approached you about being a witness at this trial, and you agreed, you gave sworn testimony in a deposition. Is that correct?

LAIRD: That's correct.

JOE: According to the deposition, you said you were "thrilled, impressed, overwhelmed" by the quality of Andrew Beckett's work. Do you remember saying that?

LAIRD: I may have said something like that. But that's not how I feel at this moment.

JOE: But, Andrew Beckett was in charge of litigation for the suit.

LAIRD: That's correct.

JOE: Were you pleased with his work?

LAIRD: We were satisfied.

JOE: Andrew Beckett represented your company in a lawsuit in 1990, is that correct?

LAIRD: Wyant Wheeler represented us.

WHEELER: Sometimes it seems like society is run by these kinds of people.

JOE: What kind of people?

WHEELER: People who want to bend the rules...

JOE: Explain to me, if you can, Mr. Wheeler, explain this to me like I'm a ten year-old. This trial is not about a disease, is that what you're saying? Not about your understandable, if unfounded, fear of catching AIDS through casual contact with someone who has it? You're saying, this trial is about Andrew Beckett's character. Am I getting this right?

WHEELER: Yes, character. To the extent that it affects a person's ability to do a great job.

WHEELER: And I hate to rush you out of here, but...

JOE: But he's got lots of other people's lives to ruin...

WHEELER: ... we've got a committee meeting.

WHEELER: Let's put it this way, Andy: your place in the future of this firm is no longer secure.

JOE: In a word, yes.

WHEELER: We don't think it's fair to keep you here, where your future is limited. But we wish you luck, Andy, all the luck in the world.

WHEELER: Andy. Before we begin, I'd just like to say: everyone in this room is your friend.

JOE: You're in trouble.

JOE: Don't you know this is exactly the kind of bullshit that makes people hate you guys?

YOUNG MAN: Fuck you! You want to kick my ass? You want to try? Asshole.

JOE: You're the asshole, buddy.

YOUNG MAN: Get a life.

JOE: Good school. What year?

YOUNG MAN: Second.

JOE: Great.

YOUNG MAN: Would you like to have a drink with me? I just finished a game, I could use a beer. I don't pick up people in drug stores every day.

JOE: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa... do you think... ? You think I'm... ... gay?

YOUNG MAN: Aren't you?

JOE: What's the matter with you? Do I look gay to you?

YOUNG MAN: Do I look gay to you? Relax.

JOE: Relax? I ought to kick your faggoty little ass for you!

YOUNG MAN: Take it as a compliment. Geesh.

JOE: I'll see you in an hour, max.

LISA: Night, honey.

JOE: Did I ever tell you, I hate costume parties?

LISA: My lettuce is wilting.

LISA: Okay, so... help me with this one, Joe... Is it disgusting for someone to put his dick into someone's mouth? Or, is it disgusting for someone to take a dick into their mouth?

JOE: Great, Lisa. Thank you.

LISA: Joe?

JOE: Yeah... ?

LISA: Two men making love... ? Now tell me again... why is that disgusting?

JOE: Lisa, c'mon. One guy sticking his dick in another guy's mouth? It's disgusting.

LISA: Don't know, Joe.

JOE: Is there some kind of expression I've picked up from Beckett?! Some kind of fairy attitude I've unconsciously adopted?! Am I walking different?! Some kind of vocal thing?! Have I picked up some kind of homo vibe?!

LISA: Have you changed your aftershave?

JOE: Very funny. I had a box of Pampers under my arm for Chrissake!

JOE: Your Aunt Teresa is gay? That beautiful, sensuous woman is a... lesbian?

LISA: Duh...

JOE: Since when?

LISA: Probably since she was born.

JOE: Allright. I admit it: I'm prejudiced. I don't want to work with a homosexual. You got me.

LISA: Okay, Joe...

JOE: I mean, two guys, doing the horizontal thing? I don't get it. Don't they get confused? "Is that mine? I thought it was yours." Hey, call me old fashioned, call me conservative... I think maybe you have to be a man to get just how nauseating the whole basic idea really is.

LISA: Fine, Joe.

JOE: And the way they work out, pumping up, so they can be macho and faggot at the same time... I can't stand that shit. Now I'm being totally honest with you.

LISA: That's perfectly clear.

JOE: Would you take a client if you were constantly thinking: "I hope this guy doesn't touch me. I don't even want him to breathe on me?"

LISA: How many gays do you know?

JOE: How many do you know?

LISA: Lots.

JOE: Who?

LISA: Karen Berman. Aunt Teresa. My cousin Tommy who lives in Rochester. Eddie Meyers from the office. Joe Cantwell, he's one of the partners. His lover, Greg. Stanley, the guy who's putting in our kitchen cabinets.

LISA: You have a problem with gays, Joe.

JOE: Not especially.

JOE: You load the film... ? No, on this side... or this side? Don't move the baby!

LISA: Give me the camera, Joe.

MRS. FINLEY: Yeah. Do I have a case?

JOE: Of course you have a case! Now, I want you to go with my assistant, Iris, and fill out some forms. She'll tell you about our fee arrangement. Mrs. Finley? Any back pain since the accident? Dizziness? Nightmares?

MRS. FINLEY: Now that you mention it...

JOE: Tell Iris all about it. Take good care of Mrs. Finley, Iris. Beckett, come in.

MRS. FINLEY: Right.

JOE: Why didn't you cross at the crosswalk?

MRS. FINLEY: Why should I?

KENTON: She didn't try to conceal it.

JOE: So you are aware of the difference between a lesion and a bruise, is that correct?

KENTON: I know the difference. That doesn't mean I'm always able to recognize the difference.

JOE: But didn't you avoid contact with Ms. Torres, after you found out she had AIDS? She says you acted repulsed by her and you avoided her, is that correct?

KENTON: I felt, and still feel, nothing but the deepest sympathy and compassion for people like Maria, who have contracted this terrible disease through no fault of their own.

JOE: You taught him a lesson.

KENTON: Yes, we did.

JOE: Like firing Andrew Beckett taught him a lesson?

KENTON: Yeah. But we took care of him.

JOE: How did you do that?

KENTON: We stuck his head in the latrine, after ten of us had used it.

KENTON: Not when I was in the Navy.

JOE: So during those long voyages, months at a time, out to sea, no women in sight, a hundred, hardworking, robust, young men, in the prime of their life, at the peak of their natural appetites, desires, their god- given, hormonal instincts... Anything going on?

KENTON: Going on... like...?

JOE: Like... two sailors playing hide the salami.

KENTON: Anywhere from two weeks, to several months.

JOE: Any women on board?

JOE: Whoa, whoa... What do you expect them to say, you're Alan Dershowitz?

KENTON: A trial takes time, Beckett. Do you know what I'm saying?

JUDGE GARNETT: This would be a good time to break for the day...

JOE: Your Honor? May I have ten minutes in re-direct?

JUDGE GARNETT: Beckett?

JUDGE GARNETT: Let's continue.

JOE: You had one guy "like that?"

JUDGE GARNETT: In this courtroom, Mr. Miller, justice is blind. To matters of race, creed, color, religion. And sexual orientation.

JOE: With all due respect, Your Honor... We don't live in this courtroom, do we?

JUDGE GARNETT: No. We don't... However, as regards this witness, I'm going to sustain the defense's objection.

JOE: Based on what my client would have earned over the next three years, including benefits and projected raises, and the extraordinary cost of medical care for someone with Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome... We would settle today for the very fair amount of one million five hundred thousand dollars.

JUDGE GARNETT: Very good, Joe. Now, Belinda, I've got a figure over here, of one million, five. I...

JOE: If it please Your Honor, we hope to settle this matter.

JUDGE GARNETT: By God you will settle it! If you force this case to trial, young man, you'll regret it for the rest of your natural-born days... Now, Joseph. What would you require to settle this matter today?

JOE: Reinstatement at full salary. Back pay covering the period of unemployment and...

JUDGE GARNETT: Hold it, Joe. He wants to come back to work, Chuck.

JUDGE GARNETT: Attorney for the plaintiff?

JOE: Joseph Miller, Your Honor. Macready and Shilts Legal Services.

JUDGE GARNETT: I've seen your television commercials. "If you or anyone you know has been injured through the fault of others... It should say, "through the negligence of others."

JOE: I'll take that under consideration, Your Honor.

JUDGE GARNETT: On behalf of the defendants?

WHEELER: ... to suit their personal desires, and the rest of us have to live with it.

KENTON: You have to make a decision: is this guy partner material?

KENTON: You'll be sorry, Beckett.

WHEELER: Andy, you don't want this.

WHEELER: Wait a minute. The man was fired for incompetence, not because he has AIDS. You didn't know he was sick, did you, Bob?

KENTON: Holy Shit. Did you, Bob?

WHEELER: Andrew brought AIDS into our offices, into our men's room. He brought AIDS to our annual goddamn family picnic.

KENTON: We ought to be suing him.

WHEELER: Julius!

KENTON: Dr. J.!

WHEELER: Andy. It seems that something has come over you, lately: A kind of... stupor, a fogginess, a lack of focus... Earth to Andy. Anybody home?

KENTON: Helloooo...

KENTON: It's good to be King, hey Charles?

WHEELER: Kings are out of fashion. I'd rather be thought of as a benevolent tyrant. It's an anti-trust action.

SEIDMAN: I didn't tell the others, I was afraid to...

WHEELER: ... But now, we're standing up for ourselves...

SEIDMAN: ... But we shouldn't have fired him...

WHEELER: ... It's time to get this society back on track!

WHEELER: Very interesting, Bob. Let's make a note of that. Andy didn't lose the complaint in his computer. He never put it in. He lied about that, too.

SEIDMAN: Charles...

WHEELER: If you feel differently, Bob, you should say so, when you're called to the stand. After all, this isn't a conspiracy.

SEIDMAN: I've discovered something interesting, Charles.

WHEELER: ... keep them from that area, on grounds of relevancy. What, Bob?

SEIDMAN: No matter how hard I try, I can't lose a file in my computer.

SEIDMAN: That's kind of... extreme, Walt. Andy's private life is none of our business.

WHEELER: Bob. You're trying my patience. Andrew Beckett is making his private life our business. We gave him Kronos. Did he say, "I'm sick. I might not be able to see this through?"

SEIDMAN: He was doing a great job.

WHEELER: Bob. I must ask you to shut the fuck up. Did Andrew Beckett say "I might not be able to serve our clients to the best of my ability?" He said nothing. And now, Andrew Beckett proposes to haul me into a court of law, to sling accusations at me, in full view of the entire, Philadelphia, judicial establishment. My God.

WHEELER: ... interview every employee, support staff, associates, partners. Did any of them know Andy was sick? How did they know? Did he tell them? Did they notice something was wrong with his appearance? None of this information got to the managing partners. We know that. Make sure everyone else does too... And Beckett: I want to know everything about his personal life. Did he frequent those pathetic bars on Camac Street?

SEIDMAN: Jesus.

WHEELER: What about other homosexual facilities, whatever they are?

SEIDMAN: Charles...

WHEELER: What deviant groups or organizations did he secretly belong to? What is it, Bob?!

SEIDMAN: Let's settle with Andy and put this whole tragic mess behind us.